Trauma Therapy
What is Trauma Therapy?
Trauma Therapy with Tell Us A Tail uses a holsitic approach, working with the brain, the body and the pysche. Trauma doesn't always involve obvious flashbacks or dissociation. Sometimes we can feel a strong adverse reaction to a situation or thought and don't understand why.. this can be because of past trauma. We can also develop unhealthy coping habits, things that we do that help us deal with the emotions we have about the trauma, such as eating or drinking too much or too little, using alcohol and/or drugs, viewing sexual material online or behaving in some sexual ways that doesn't make us feel good in the long term.
Symptoms
Events happen and we can't always control that, but we can learn to control how we respond to them and claim our wellbeing back.
Anxiety is often a symptom of trauma and it causes issues with sleep, nerves, pain and obsessive behaviours in an attempt to control an element of our environment.
Having anxiety is very tiring and can leave you feeling exhausted. Therapy can help you to learn relaxation and grounding techniques.
Stress is often the best friend of anxiety, they walk hand in hand bringing a concoction of emotions that have psychological and physical implications.
Stress and anxiety are high in energy in comparison to depression which is low energy. Both can impact long term health conditions such as diabetes, blood pressure and metabolic syndrome.
All the above also impacts sexual functioning.
Rewind Therapy
Rewind therapy is a brief intense therapy which helps us to process a memory. Think of traumatic memories like an unwanted guest in your kitchen, you want it to leave through the front door (into the long term memory), but every time you are faced with it, you can't bare the sight of it and therefore, don't show it the door because that would require you to engage with it. So it sits in the kitchen, where you can see it every now and again when you really don't want to.
Rewind therapy helps usher the guest (memory) out of the front door and into the long term memory where it can be called upon if it's needed but is no longer free to pop up when you enter the kitchen.
A sign that a memory needs processing is when you still see it through your own eyes, rather than in the 3rd person, where you can see yourself.
Overcoming trauma
PTSD is associated with war veterans but many people suffer short and/or long term effects from a traumatic situation. Sometimes this can even be vicarious trauma, meaning that you might not have experienced trauma first hand, but you have been around it or someone who has.
Symptoms of trauma include anxiety, lack of sleep, bad dreams, feeling angry or scared quickly and experiencing flash backs where you feel a strong memories of the traumatic situation. Sometimes, this can lead to dissociation, where you feel as thought you are back in the event and may even talk as though you are reliving it.
Feeling tired, rushes of emotions and pain in the body without medical reason.
Therapy helps the mind, brain and body process the traumatic event/s and teaches the body that it is no longer under threat.
Mindfulness
We can all benefit from mindfulness. One of my favourite illustrations about mindfulness shows a dog and it's owner at the park. The dog thinks only of the sky, the smells, the trees and the ground beneath its feet. The owners mind is full of worries about bills, past and future conversations and planning days into the future and regretting the past.
Mindfulness teaches us to stay in the moment, because whilst we are in the park, there is nothing we can do about what to make for dinner next friday! Using our senses and being in the moment allows us to top up our wellbeing 'piggy bank' so that it's there in the times that we need it.
Mindfulness helps our brains and nervous systems learn that we are in the pressnt and not under the same threat we once were and so, the body can relax.
Sex and intimacy after abuse
Sexual, physical, emotional and psychological abuse can impact sexual functioning and intimacy no matter how recent or historic. I am deeply aware of how triggering a simple touch can be for someone who has experienced abuse. This can cause feelings of guilt, shame and obligation and puts pressure on relationships.
Similarly people can find themselves frequently seeking new sexual activity or partners in order to feel validated, desirable or loved but ultimately, don't feel good afterwards.
Feeling vulnerable is very hard when you have been through sexual abuse, but I can help you be stronger and redefine your boundaries and find your safe sexual self.
When you are ready to talk.. we are listening.
'Nothing in nature blooms all year'
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